Flashback to Freedom

On my days off when I don’t have any errands to run my outfit is more relaxed. Today I’m going to wear a big sloppy shirt and comfy shorts.

I found the shirt in a stack of shirts in my closet and realized it needed to be ironed because it was very wrinkled and today (I don’t know why) the wrinkles would have bothered me. So my first chore before getting dressed was ironing the wrinkles out of the shirt. I’m not good at ironing but I was determined to see if I could eliminate more wrinkles than I added.

While ironing the shirt I had a flashback to many years ago when my uncle gave me a shirt. My sister and I were visiting him-for what reason I don’t recall. Then my flashback went back a little further to my childhood.

I had two uncles that I thought didn’t like me. I never could come up with the reason why in my head but that’s what I felt. I did think one uncle liked me a little more than the other.

While ironing the shirt I did remembered the uncle that I thought didn’t like me the most gave me a shirt when I was visiting and he also released my inheritance his twin brother left me when he passed away. I felt a little better.

As I finished ironing I looked at the logo on front of the shirt and realized the shirt wasn’t the one my uncle gave me. It was a shirt I received from a vendor who visited my job. That gave me a chuckle when I also remembered the shirts were two different colors.

It’s interesting how things from the past show up unexpectedly that possibly need to be dealt with. I believe I needed to deal with that issue. I dealt with that issue and felt better but wish I had an opportunity to discuss my feelings with him before he passed away.

So from now on I’m going to keep a check on my feelings and emotions and if I feel some way I’m going to discuss my feelings so I won’t be carrying them around many years like I have with these.

Do you have feelings about your relationship with someone that need to be discussed so you can be set free and you can free the person? If you do please deal with them immediately.

WHAT ABOUT ME

Busy listening

Giving counseling

Drying tears

Encouraging words

Holding hands

Hugging tight

Helping those

Morning, noon and night

Drained to the core

Words-there’s no more

Energy is spent

Body hard hit

Along with the mind

Phone always ringing

Mostly sobbing

No singing

What do you think

What should I do

Never how are you doing

Is life treating you well

Is there anything I can do

Can we talk about you

I’m here for you day or night.

Sitting before the Lord

Reevaluating my life

Not seeing progress

Nor my prayers answered

I cried out from

The depth of my soul

What about me

What about me Lord

What about me

I don’t see what I prayed for

Why no one cares to listen to me

Ask me hard questions

That make me think

Receive a hug I didn’t give

A tissue to wipe away my tears

What about me

What about me Lord

Will it ever be my time?